Category: March 2011 (Luck v. Faith)

Heart Gallery: Helping Foster Children Find FOREVER FAMILIES; Part Four of Interview with Barbara Schechter

On By femmefuelIn FemmeInterviews by Sasha Katz, March 2011 (Luck v. Faith)Leave a comment

By AbbyA

As our final day of Luck v. Faith, we are sharing with you a wonderful organization that brings foster children to forever families through photography.  Barbara Schechter is the Executive Director of Heart Gallery.  In addition to sharing about Heart Gallery, Barbara gives her comments on luck, faith and ministering to foster kids.

“I don’t attribute finding a forever family to luck because I do believe that God has a plan for each of us and that the Heart Gallery helps to carry out His plan for these children.”    Barbara Schechter

What about Heart Gallery photographers?  Tell us about their role in the organization.  How do your photographers feel when they become aware that their photo drew a family to a child?  Any stories you’d like to share?

The photographers are so dedicated! They love to donate their time and they are a very talented group. The Heart Gallery wants to include any professional photographer who has the desire to participate. Our only rule is that they have to be a professional (although we do use some amateur photographers for event photos). When a local child’s adoption is finalized, we invite the photographer to attend the adoption. It’s a very emotional time and probably the most rewarding part of what we do. A number of the photographers have written about their experiences on their blogs. They tell it better than I do!

The Words of Sandy Levy: I would like to talk about a very touching moment as a result of photographing kids waiting for adoption for the Heart Gallery of Broward.  What happened was that a child named Cleveland was one of the kids that I photographed several months ago for the Heart Gallery. I shot Cleveland, just a week or two before he turned 18, he was adopted.

This is particularly special and critical because: Once a child turns 18, they are no longer in the program and are considered adults. Then they are more or less on their own. It is quite unusual for a child that old to get adopted. In some extreme cases, they end up in the streets.

Barbara Schechter Executive Director of The Heart Gallery of Broward County pulled me aside at an awards presentation event on Oct. 14, and told me that my photo was responsible for Cleveland’s new Mom becoming interested in adopting him. Obviously Barbara was very pleased and frankly, it really gave me a very warm feeling as well, as this was also very special for me.

Barbara contacted me a week or two later asking if I could be at the courthouse when the official adoption took place in the Judges chambers. She told me she would understand if I could not be there, but she hoped that I would be able to go. Of course I accepted and I did not mind taking a camera.

The reason that Cleveland’s adoption was rushed in the judge’s chambers before National Adoption Day was that by Nov. 15, Cleveland would be over 18 and therefore ineligible for this type of adoption.

Cleveland and his Mom also thanked me privately and that was very nice to hear. In addition, Cleveland would possibly like to become a photographer. I found out he is already an accomplished amateur photographer as he proudly showed me some of his photos.

I must say that the feeling of satisfaction knowing that an image that you make was in some way at least partly responsible for a difficult-to-adopt child to find a family, is quite amazing and wonderful.

I told NBC 6 that I cannot recall another photo assignment that was as personally satisfying to me in my 40 years as a professional photographer. Not monetarily satisfying of course, but personally satisfying!.

You can find more information about Sandy Levy and his photographic work at his main website  www.levyphoto.com or http://asmpflorida.blogspot.com/2009/12/asmp-south-florida-members-spot-light.html.

To hear another photographer ‘s personal experience, check out http://blog.brighthousephotography.com/search/label/personal   (Scroll down to August 2 for Ashlee’s Story).

If you are interested in getting involved with Heart Gallery, please visit www.heartgalleryofbroward.org or call or email Barbara Schechter directly.  Tel: 954-918-3008 or barbara@heartgalleryofbroward.org.

Heart Gallery: Helping Foster Children Find FOREVER FAMILIES; Part Three of Interview with Barbara Schechter

On By femmefuelIn FemmeInterviews by Sasha Katz, March 2011 (Luck v. Faith)Leave a comment

By AbbyA

As we move into our final week of Luck v. Faith, we are sharing with you a wonderful organization that brings foster children to forever families through photography.  Barbara Schechter is the Executive Director of Heart Gallery.  In addition to sharing about Heart Gallery, Barbara gives her comments on luck, faith and ministering to foster kids.

“I don’t attribute finding a forever family to luck because I do believe that God has a plan for each of us and that the Heart Gallery helps to carry out His plan for these children.”    Barbara Schechter

Describe that first phone call to Heart Gallery when a family reaches out to adopt a particular child.  Is it your experience that families feel that fate or God’s will is at work in bringing a new child into their family? 

There are two types of callers – those who are already licensed and looking to find a specific child and those who have just started thinking about adoption and know little or nothing about the process. People who are looking for a specific child have often fallen in love with a picture, but are confident in their desire to adopt. They have been through a long, thorough process so they know that adoption is what they want. The new people usually have some fear or uncertainty about adopting a child from foster care and need to better understand what to expect. Bringing a stranger into your family forever can be a scary thing to do and there’s always a fear that the match will not work out. It’s a journey that not everyone is prepared for. Christian families usually believe that it is God’s will for them to adopt and they prayerfully consider this big step vs. the alternative of going with one’s gut instinct.

You mentioned to me that some people don’t even realize that they are called to adopt.  Please elaborate on that.

This applies to both adoption and foster parenting. Christians consider it a calling and they are obedient to the call. They don’t give up on difficult children and they understand when the outcome is not what they would have wanted. The best example of this is people who do foster-to-adopt, which greatly increases one’s chances to adopt a younger child. Because foster parents are usually given the first opportunity to adopt when a child in their care becomes available, many people foster with the hope or expectation that they will be able to adopt that child. When it doesn’t work out, either the child is reunited with their birth parents or a relative comes forward to adopt, many people find this hard to accept because they have bonded with the child and their hopes are dashed. Christians generally understand that God is in control and that the outcome is His will. Many non-Christians find this ‘gamble’ too difficult to take.

If a family is not ready to adopt, but wants to get involved in the Heart Gallery, how can they help? 

Our mantra is that everyone can do something to help a foster child. If a family is not prepared to foster or adopt, they can donate gently used items to a foster care agency or volunteer to help at an event for foster children. There are a number of opportunities for people who want to have a closer relationship with a foster child, including tutoring or mentoring (Note- The agencies do not allow children under the age of 15 to volunteer directly with the foster children). Mentoring is a top priority right now, as children need a constant adult in their life who is not paid to supervise them. Mentors are a combination of trusted friend and parent surrogate. Moreover, as the child gets older, the mentor can be the safety net that the child needs when they are on their own – a trusted relationship. The Heart Gallery compiles a guide to volunteering with foster children that is available on the home page of our web site, www.heartgalleryofbroward.org.  Or if you’d like to volunteer to help with Heart Gallery events, please contact me. We’d love to get you involved!

If you are interested in getting involved with Heart Gallery, tune in for the rest of the week for more of Barbara Schechter’s interview.  You can also visit www.heartgalleryofbroward.org or call or email Barbara directly.  Tel: 954-918-3008 or barbara@heartgalleryofbroward.org.

Heart Gallery: Helping Foster Children Find FOREVER FAMILIES; Part Two of Interview with Barbara Schechter

On By femmefuelIn FemmeInterviews by Sasha Katz, March 2011 (Luck v. Faith)Leave a comment

By AbbyA

As we move into our final week of Luck v. Faith, we are sharing with you a wonderful organization that brings foster children to forever families through photography.  Barbara Schechter is the Executive Director of Heart Gallery.  In addition to sharing about Heart Gallery, Barbara gives her comments on luck, faith and ministering to foster kids.

“I don’t attribute finding a forever family to luck because I do believe that God has a plan for each of us and that the Heart Gallery helps to carry out His plan for these children.”    Barbara Schechter

Share a story of a child’s adoption that started with Heart Gallery.  Is it possible that pure luck changed this child’s life?  Do you see something deeper when you look at the whole picture of how the foster child and new family’s lives collided?

I’m attaching a story [below] that I wrote in a recent newsletter about the Scott family and how they came to adopt an 11-year-old girl named Kassandra. You can see God at work here, as each of these two parents were drawn separately to the same child’s photo. It also happened that Kassie had already been matched with another family when the Scotts first started considering adoption, but after their plans got postponed, Kassie’s original match did not work out and she was now available for the Scotts. When you see the three of them together, you get the sense that they were meant to be a family.

I don’t attribute finding a forever family to luck because I do believe that God has a plan for each of us and that the Heart Gallery helps to carry out His plan for these children. In Kassie’s case, the Scott’s would not have been able to adopt her when she was first available, but the ‘coincidence’ of her becoming available again made everything work out the way I think God intended. They are greatly blessed by becoming a family.

There are so many amazing success stories of children whose lives were transformed by finding the right ‘forever family’. But personally, I struggle with the reality that God’s plan for some includes subjection to often horrible parental abuse and then never finding their adoptive family. We do believe that the Heart Gallery is called to minister to the children who do not get adopted just as much as we facilitate transforming the lives of those children who do.

 An Adoption That Started with “Christmas Home” by Barbara Schechter

When the First Baptist Church of Fort Lauderdale hosted the Heart Gallery exhibit during their famous Christmas Pageant in 2008, they incorporated a stirring message about foster children right into the show. Pageant Director John Jones and his family performed a song called ‘Christmas Home’ and made an appeal for people to consider bringing a foster child into their home. Photos of Heart Gallery children flashed on the screen behind them. There was hardly a dry eye in the room. One of those photos was of then-nine-year-old Kassandra. Little did they know that one day she would become a member of their own congregation.

On June 22, Kassandra, known as Kassie, was adopted by a young couple named Tim and Heather as their only child. She told Judge Porter, in front of a large group of friends and relatives, that she had “perfect parents”. Clearly, there was a lot of love in the room. There was also a feeling that these three people were meant to be together.

It all started with the Christmas Pageant. Tim and Heather, each volunteering at different performances, noticed Kassie’s photo in the Heart Gallery exhibit and each took a copy of her bio card. They had taken the MAPP classes to become foster parents but had not completed their home study. They were starting to consider adopting. When they discovered that they had each pulled the card of the same child, it was on their hearts to pursue her adoption. But it was not quite so simple. The possibility of a career move to another state, followed by extensive plumbing damage to their home that held up their home study, caused enough delay that another family was selected for Kassie. Still they continued to pray for her. With a repaired home, a decision to stay in the area and an adoptive home study in hand, they contacted ChildNet only to find that Kassie’s match did not result in an adoption and she was available again. The rest is history.

Kassie left her adoption finalization with her Heart Gallery photo in hand. The photographer, Courtney Ortiz, was there to see her receive it, along with the Executive Director, President and two founders of the Heart Gallery. To quote Senior Pastor Larry Thompson, who was also there to witness the occasion, “This adoption makes everything worth it!”

Read more about this story in the Hollywood Gazette . . .

http://www.hollywoodgazette.com/2009/component/content/article/53-feature-stories/867-heart-gallery-local-photographers-find-foster-children-forever-families

If you are interested in getting involved with Heart Gallery, tune in for the rest of the week for more of Barbara Schechter’s interview.  You can also visit www.heartgalleryofbroward.org or call or email Barbara directly.  Tel: 954-918-3008 or barbara@heartgalleryofbroward.org.

Heart Gallery: Helping Foster Children Find FOREVER FAMILIES; Part One of Interview with Barbara Schechter

On By femmefuelIn FemmeInterviews by Sasha Katz, March 2011 (Luck v. Faith)Leave a comment

By AbbyA

As we move into our final week of Luck v. Faith, we are sharing with you a wonderful organization that brings foster children to forever families through photography.  Barbara Schechter is the Executive Director of Heart Gallery.  In addition to sharing about Heart Gallery, Barbara gives her comments on luck, faith and ministering to foster kids.

“I don’t attribute finding a forever family to luck because I do believe that God has a plan for each of us and that the Heart Gallery helps to carry out His plan for these children.”    Barbara Schechter

What is Heart Gallery and how did you get involved?

The Heart Gallery of Broward is a traveling exhibit and website of photos of foster children in Broward who are available for adoption. In nearly all cases, the children’s parental rights have been terminated by the courts, so they will remain in the foster care system until a family adopts them or until they turn 18. The photos are taken by professional photographers who donate their time. The exhibit travels every month or two to a new location in Broward. It goes to high-traffic places like malls, libraries and office buildings, as well as large churches. The objective is to raise awareness about foster care adoption and about other ways that people can help foster children, such as foster parenting, mentoring or Guardian ad Litem.

I originally got involved as a board member in the organization’s first year. I claimed that I was too busy to be involved, but I became more and more drawn to what the Heart Gallery was doing. I had recently retired from a marketing career, but felt called to go back and run the Heart Gallery when they needed their first full-time employee. It has been hugely rewarding to see it grow from a simple idea four years ago into to an organization that has found ‘forever families’ for over 60 children and raised awareness about foster care among so many people.

What does it mean to have a “forever family”? 

The term is synonymous with ‘adoptive family’. To the child, ‘forever’ means that they no longer live their lives with uncertainty about their future- not knowing where they will live next or for how long, and whether they will need to make a life on their own when they turn 18. Most of the children come from families that never gave them a lot of love, so their ‘forever family’ provides unconditional love and security that have never known.

If you are interested in getting involved with Heart Gallery, tune in for the rest of the week for more of Barbara Schechter’s interview.  You can also visit www.heartgalleryofbroward.org or call or email Barbara directly.  Tel: 954-918-3008 or barbara@heartgalleryofbroward.org.

Part 5 of Interview with Matt Patterson, Author of My Emily

On By femmefuelIn FemmeInterviews by JMathis, March 2011 (Luck v. Faith)1 Comment

Emily wasn’t born perfect – so one might think. She was born with Down Syndrome and many would jump to the conclusion that she would have very little hope for a life with any significance. Two years later came the diagnosis of leukemia. What little hope remaining turned to no hope whatsoever – or so one might think. This short story tells how the life of one little girl, with all its perceived imperfections, had great meaning. Her loving nature and courage touched the hearts of everyone she met. She also taught them how to value their own lives – even with their many “imperfections.” –From My Emily, by Matt Patterson.  

Matt Patterson, the author of My Emily, is a writer who decided to finally share the story of his daughter with hopes to raise funds for those who are raising children with special needs and fighting cancer. My Emily is indeed a testament of a father’s love for his daughter. More importantly, it is a heartwarming memoir of how in just a short time here on this earth, a young daughter transformed the life of her father, and all those who came in contact with her.

In this month when FemmeFuel is contemplating the ideas of luck vs. faith, we interview Matt Patterson, who on the surface may seem “unlucky” when his daughter Emily is born with Down Syndrome, and later diagnosed with leukemia. However, as Matt shares, it was he who was blessed by God in the call to serve as Emily’s father.

In case you missed it, click here to read Part 1…

Click here to read Part 2…

Click here to read Part 3…

Click here to read Part 4…

Do you find Jesus most connected to our lives when you consider Him (a) with us in our suffering or (b) as the one who rescues us from our suffering?

I might be taking the easy way out – but I’m going to say both. Allow me to explain.

When Emily was born and we heard the word, “leukemia,” we were devastated. He was with us. We sought Him out in prayer long before we heard this diagnosis, so we knew He was with us.

Once Emily passed, I was mad at God. I was ticked. I wanted nothing to do with Him.

To allow His angel to suffer as such, well, I didn’t have much use for a God that permitted that. He rescued me by having me tell others of her passing. A heart that was full of anger and venom was cleansed by His mercy. By having me speak with others over and over again, it made me realize the comfort that He provides. At a time when I could have completely forsaken him, He rescued me.

Do you have a more sincere, true faith after being on this journey with Emily? How is it different from the faith you had prior to your experiences with Emily?

 Yes, I most certainly do! I can now say, “But I trust in you, O Lord; ‘You are my God.’ My times are in your hands.”(Psalm 31:14-15) I could have never said that even three years ago.

At the time of Emily’s birth, diagnosis and passing,  we were members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (also known as Mormon or LDS).  I do have to admit at times I felt Emily’s conditions were the Lord’s way of punishing me for not being the perfect member of that religion.

It wasn’t until three years ago we attended a church and the message spoke heavily of legalism. It was the second time we visited a Christian church and when I heard the statement, “You have to ask yourself this question. Am I practicing a religion or do I have a relationship with God?”

After living my whole life entrenched in a religion that based my level of salvation on my deeds and accomplishments, and to hear this question. It was life-changing. As soon as my wife and I heard it – we looked at each other simultaneously. When we left that night, I asked my wife if she would support me leaving the LDS chuch. She gave me a wonderful, one word answer – “Absolutely.”

So today, to know what mercy and grace are – (words we never heard before) – well, it’s a long way from the burden of guilt and depression associated with legalism.

Order My Emily today on Amazon to help support families who are raising children with special needs and cancer. To learn more about Emily’s story, check out My Emily on Facebook.

Part 4 of Interview with Matt Patterson, Author of My Emily

On By femmefuelIn FemmeInterviews by JMathis, March 2011 (Luck v. Faith)1 Comment

Emily wasn’t born perfect – so one might think. She was born with Down Syndrome and many would jump to the conclusion that she would have very little hope for a life with any significance. Two years later came the diagnosis of leukemia. What little hope remaining turned to no hope whatsoever – or so one might think. This short story tells how the life of one little girl, with all its perceived imperfections, had great meaning. Her loving nature and courage touched the hearts of everyone she met. She also taught them how to value their own lives – even with their many “imperfections.” –From My Emily, by Matt Patterson.  

Matt Patterson, the author of My Emily, is a writer who decided to finally share the story of his daughter with hopes to raise funds for those who are raising children with special needs and fighting cancer. My Emily is indeed a testament of a father’s love for his daughter. More importantly, it is a heartwarming memoir of how in just a short time here on this earth, a young daughter transformed the life of her father, and all those who came in contact with her.

In this month when FemmeFuel is contemplating the ideas of luck vs. faith, we interview Matt Patterson, who on the surface may seem “unlucky” when his daughter Emily is born with Down Syndrome, and later diagnosed with leukemia. However, as Matt shares, it was he who was blessed by God in the call to serve as Emily’s father.

In case you missed it, click here to read Part 1…

Click here to read Part 2…

Click here to read Part 3…

What scriptures, poems, songs or books helped you along your journey with Emily? 

I’m one who loves to find words – whether they’re from scripture, songs, books – to gain a greater sense of comfort or understanding of a personal situation.

Among scriptures, I find – Philippians 4:6-7: Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Also, 1 Peter 5:7 – Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 – Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

And in regard to serving others, Romans 8:28 strikes me: And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

There are also lyrics I share in the book of a lullaby titled, “Goodnight Emily” that bring me back to the nights I would rock Emily to sleep. It was our time together each and every night.

Goodnight Emily, sleep tight Emily,
Jesus keep your dreams.
The God above is a God of love
so, little girl sleep in peace.

Currently, there are numerous Christian Contemporary songs and groups that bring me closer to God, inspiring me in moments of stress or times where I just need to take a breather. I can only say that the work of these artists have brought such a calmness in my life when I’ve needed it the most. I really love finding lyrics that touch me with regard to what I have endured in the past or what I’m currently experiencing.

In the past, I was previously a U2 and Bruce Springsteen fanatic. Now, I only listen to artists and groups such as The Robbie Seay Band, Sanctus Real, Matthew West, Casting Crowns, and the Michael Gungor Band. I’m a better person by making this subtle change in my life. 

Stay tuned tomorrow for more of Matt Patterson‘s interview with FemmeFuel…

Order My Emily today on Amazon to help support families who are raising children with special needs and cancer. To learn more about Emily’s story, check out My Emily on Facebook.

Part 3 of Interview with Matt Patterson, Author of My Emily

On By femmefuelIn FemmeInterviews by JMathis, March 2011 (Luck v. Faith)Leave a comment

Emily wasn’t born perfect – so one might think. She was born with Down Syndrome and many would jump to the conclusion that she would have very little hope for a life with any significance. Two years later came the diagnosis of leukemia. What little hope remaining turned to no hope whatsoever – or so one might think. This short story tells how the life of one little girl, with all its perceived imperfections, had great meaning. Her loving nature and courage touched the hearts of everyone she met. She also taught them how to value their own lives – even with their many “imperfections.” –From My Emily, by Matt Patterson.

Matt Patterson, the author of My Emily, is a writer who decided to finally share the story of his daughter with hopes to raise funds for those who are raising children with special needs and fighting cancer. My Emily is indeed a testament of a father’s love for his daughter. More importantly, it is a heartwarming memoir of how in just a short time here on this earth, a young daughter transformed the life of her father, and all those who came in contact with her.

In this month when FemmeFuel is contemplating the ideas of luck vs. faith, we interview Matt Patterson, who on the surface may seem “unlucky” when his daughter Emily is born with Down Syndrome, and later diagnosed with leukemia. However, as Matt shares, it was he who was blessed by God in the call to serve as Emily’s father.

In case you missed it, click here to read Part 1…

Click here to read Part 2…

Did any questions about suffering lead you to retreat from people, or reach out more towards others? 

Shortly after Emily’s passing, I think that both my wife and I withdrew from people. I personally had a very deep anger toward God.

Here’s where my “why” question came in to the picture. Why does a God allow a child – not just my child, but any child – to suffer through this type of illness and the treatments associated with it? Why does a God allow a child with special needs to suffer like this? Why does a merciful God allow a child to go through this illness and harsh treatments to allow her to go into remission and then, allow her to relapse, and again, start an even more intense regimen of chemotherapy? Those were my questions regarding suffering and shortly after Emily’s passing, I cut off all communication with God. I was mad. I was furious. I wasn’t going to give Him the time of day. The farther I pushed away from God, however, the more opportunities He gave to me to share Emily’s passing with those I came into contact with on a daily basis. I finally came to the conclusion that God gave me these sharing experiences with others as a way of healing. Are there days I still cry while sharing it? Of course. I have always wanted to help those families with children who have special needs or those battling pediatric cancer. I just didn’t know how to do so. Twenty years later, he gave me a vehicle to share her story and hopefully help others.

How would you advise other people on how to minister to or support a family going through what your family has gone through with Emily? What do you wish was done for your family during that time?

First, I have to say that the blessings that come from serving, comforting and supporting others are absolutely immeasurable. 

 It’s my thought and belief that each of us grieve differently. For example, I have always wanted to share Emily’s story, but was I ready to minister and comfort others, say 10 years ago? I would have to say no.  Now that I have a better understanding of the grieving process, I can truly say my passion to share her story and help others is at a level that’s difficult to quantify. It becomes very personal and emotional some days. There are still days when I need to lean on those closest to me for support and comfort. I have to say there was so much done for us during Emily’s illness and passing, I don’t look back and say, “Well, it would’ve been nice if they were there more for us.” We consider ourselves blessed for the support we did receive.

Stay tuned tomorrow for more of Matt Patterson‘s interview with FemmeFuel…

Order My Emily today on Amazon to help support families who are raising children with special needs and cancer. To learn more about Emily’s story, check out My Emily on Facebook.