Unsure

Unsure is not uncertain. Have you ever felt that? I am certain about many things. These are the truths that we live by. I am certain about the love story that God has written to me, to humanity. I am certain that my primary privileges in this life are to disciple my kids and love and serve my husband. I am certain that God has given me hands and a mind to work. I am certain that God has given me all the talents and gifts I need to do these things, and, in addition, to be a good friend, to be a good writer and to, genuinely, be an active blessing to my community. I am certain about these things.

But, unsure, that is a different dimension for me. Walking to your certainties feels unsure. Thinking through what that walk looks like has to happen all of the time. There are a few times a year that the process seems natural. No one can deny that January calls for a recap or relook at where you are going and how. If you have kids, you probably do the same as summer approaches and as the new school year approaches, and a few times in between. In my marriage, I often fall into the trap of recapping only when we are in a valley. As an individual, I think I beat myself up with the recap almost everyday (but that bad habit is being worked on). The crux of this is that the day to day journey that leads you to accomplish what you are certain of is a process.

It would be nice to think or believe that the process of the walk is definite or unquestionable, but it is not. It’s the depth of faith in the certainty that moves you along the walk. I also think that the time and care placed into the decision making along walk is crucial. Sometimes there are clear yeses and sometimes clear nos. Sometimes we are in the grey until the answer is apparent. Sometimes timing matters more than others. It is our choice to place our highest measure of dependence on certain or uncertain truths.

What do we place our highest measure of dependence on? There are factors, and as much as we’d all like to say God is my sole factor, sometimes it is a progression to get to solely God. I think about man, the human factor. Everyone, well intentioned or not, has their opinion. I think about our fears and how they drive us. I think about our internal battles of what we personally want verse what God has planned for us. It is a silent place when we can hear the direction of God unfettered by the human factors. It is a silent place of total peace and the insurgence of joy when we can hear the direction of God.

I am certain of the things I know to be true. I walk unsure sometimes. I don’t like to be unsure, but humanity promises that unsure will be the case sometimes. Unsure is shattered when the voice of God settles the walk with His purpose and plan for, ultimately, His outcome. I hope to be practical enough to dig into the regular practice of wisely planning my steps. I hope to be dependent enough to hear the mighty voice of God take away my unsure and plant in me direction. I hope to have the faith to remain always certain of the things I know to be true. Unsure is not uncertain.

Proverbs 16:9

A man’s mind plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps and makes them sure. (AMP)

We make our own plans, but the Lord decides where we will go. (CEV)

People can plan what they want to do, but it is the Lord who guides their steps. (ERV)

We should make plans—counting on God to direct us. (TLB)

We plan the way we want to live, but only God makes us able to live it. (MSG)

People do their best making plans for their lives, but the Eternal guides each step. (Voice)

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