What if you opened your mind to the possibility of a new friend?
What if there was someone out there who made sure you always felt like you belonged?
What if you took a chance at being vulnerable in front of other women?
What if you tried being honest with others (and yourself) for a change?
What if there was a friend out there who would challenge you to be the real you?
What if there was a friend out there who would take you on a new set of adventures?
What if you made a friend who became closer than a sister?
What if you met a friend who always made you laugh? Who made you pee from laughter?
What if you stopped judging someone long enough to realize that she is just like you?
What if you didn’t have to be self-conscious about your body, your mind or your spirituality in front of other women?
What if you always felt like you were personally invited?
What if it didn’t have to be hard to meet new friends?
What if you didn’t have to be nervous or self-aware when sharing your story or your past?
What if it didn’t have to be a chore to smile or make small talk with women?
What if new friends could become part of your family?
What if there was a friend who never made you feel invisible or like a third wheel?
What if you could meet someone who really wanted to know all about you?
What if you didn’t have to play the one-upmanship game with women?
What if the pretty girl wasn’t a mean girl?
What if you didn’t always have to be perfect or right for someone to like you?
What if you didn’t have to feel the need to compare yourself to other women?
What if it was okay to be friendly without being accused of being perky or saccharine?
What if you don’t have to say a word, because she already knows how you feel?
What if you didn’t have to worry about every word you said in front of other women?
What if you didn’t have to prove to someone that you were some über-Christian?
What if the words “fake” and “phony” only applied to the “Prada” purses you and your new friend bought off of a street vendor?
What if you made a friend who genuinely prayed for you and with you?
What if you had a friend who made you want to seek more of Jesus?
What if you could cry in front of someone new without feeling like you are needy?
What if you had a friend who reached out to you, without you reaching out to her first?
What if hugs from a friend came naturally?
What if meeting other women didn’t have to be so intimidating?
What if you felt freedom in being able to trust a new friend?
What if making a new friend didn’t have to feel like being hazed by a sorority?
What if you could hit it off with someone just like you, or someone nothing like you?
What if you had someone with whom you could share your secrets? Your dreams?
What if you didn’t have to prove your friendships through Facebook pictures?
What if you walked into a women’s group and you immediately felt like you were home?
Haven’t you waited long enough? Isn’t it time to put yourself out there?
Take a chance on friendship…again.
Be the friend you always wanted for yourself.
Be the woman in the group who makes everyone feel welcome.
Be the change you want to see in this world (thanks, Mahatma Gandhi).
Matthew 7:12. “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.”
What If…by Donald Miller @ Catalyst West 2010:
2 thoughts on “The Scary What If’s About Making New Friendships”
Thank you. I needed these words this morning SO MUCH.
There is so much I can relate to in your writing, its as if you see into my heart. It is painfully frightening thinking of being yourself, only to be talked about unfairly later. The unneccesary striving I have felt in my past friendships. The supposed closest friends that look at all your pictures of your romantic getaway on Facebook, and refuse to compliment them or even mention them. Close friends that as one blogger wrote stopped looking you in the eyes a long time ago because they aren´t happy with themselves.
Reinvesting again and hoping not to have a repeated loss of a potential friend warrants deep breaths and a sense of adventure. It also requires laying down our fears and pride. Once we are able to leap, we realize how starved we really are as women. As Christian women. As imperfect women. Thank you…